As our loved ones age, it’s natural for family members to increase the amount of time and support that we devote to them. One of our community members, Donna, shared her story about her mother with us. Donna’s mom, Sharon, seemed to be showing some mild signs of aging. Each passing year, Donna wondered if it was time to provide her mom with someone who could commit to being her caregiver.
Looking back, Donna can identify five early signs that her mother needed more help and support.
1. Withdrawing from social activities
Donna realized this was one of the first signs that Sharon had an issue with caring for herself. Sharon began making excuses to avoid activities she had previously enjoyed - Bingo, lunch with her friends, and volunteering at the city’s animal shelter started falling away.
2. Problems managing medications
Sharon had always been right on top of filling her medication box every Sunday to start her week. Donna began to notice that there were days when her mom missed taking her medication. After several misses, she checked the medications and found that some medications were not in the box and some were in there too many times.
3. Difficulty managing mail and paying bills
Mail and paper items appeared to be building up. Donna would stop to visit and notice the mail was unopened and in piles. Some of the mail that was opened was junk mail that should’ve been thrown away, but Sharon was keeping it to “look at it later”. She also began receiving bills that included late payment fees.
4. Unsafe driving
While Sharon didn’t drive very often, it became clear that she was having difficulty remembering where familiar places were located. She also had trouble judging where to stop or how to correctly turn (too wide or too tight).
5. Neglecting personal hygiene
Sharon had always taken great care with her appearance. Her clothes were neatly cared for and she accessorized with a little jewelry and light makeup. Donna perceived that hygiene was becoming an issue when her mom’s hair looked unkempt and her clothes were wrinkled and occasionally dirty, as if she had worn them for several days.
Thankfully, Donna was able to find a loving caregiver to help with her mom, but it did take some time. She believes if she had been able to identify these signs sooner, it would’ve been less stressful to find quality help. Donna’s advice: when you start to notice changes, however small, begin to gather resources. Make sure you have a plan in place to provide the best possible caregiver for your loved one.
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